You Know You're Portuguese When...... (2)

You get a letter from your doctor saying you can't work because of an "unspecified, ongoing medical condition" and then go on a two-week holiday.
Your child's teacher misses two weeks (because of a letter from his or her doctor) and you don't complain because you also will use the same doctor when you have to miss two weeks from your work.
If you are from Porto you don't like people from Lisbon and call them Moors. The reverse is also true but they don't call you a nice word like "Moor".
You think Brazilians speak incorrect Portuguese and will not read a book written in Brazilian Portuguese.
The last major military victory you can remember your country having was the Battle of Aljubarrota in 1385.
You say that the Portuguese, unlike the Spanish, are good at learning foreign languages.
Going to Portugal involves buying gifts for all 500 members of your family
You go crazy for the World Cup
You have grape vines in your backyard
You earned over $10,000 for your first communion.
To hell with the Turkey and Roast Beef! X-mas dinner was bacalhau au braz, baby!
A barbeque does not consist of burgers on the grill... Hello! Can you say sardinhas?
You've had your license for a month, but your $20,000 car has been "hooked up" for a year. I'm talking rims, tints, a system...
A wooden spoon equals discipline, or if you ever had to duck so you wouldn't get hit with flying shoes.
Your parents anticipate that you'll marry your first long-term boyfriend/girlfriend.
When you hear the word "Sagres" you think Beer, not historical marine school.
Nothing beats a buttered papo-seco.
You think that 2am is too early to go to bed and that 11am is to early to get out of bed.
Your grandmother tells you look sick because you are too thin.
Your parents make you eat 3 servings of dinner at each sitting otherwise they think you don't like the cooking.
You're proud to be Portuguese - and you pass these jokes on to all your Portuguese friends!

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